Normalize Saying Ur Gooning Without Necessarily Touching Yourself💔

 A dramatic take on life :3

28.3.25 

My digital footprint HATES to see me coming

Look, I don't like the idea of finishing. That's all. But like, if I feel like wanna goon, I'll go on AO3 and find works with all tags I need from any fandom because the one I usually read from has like 6k fics and most are post-canon so there isn't really an option. 

"Maybe r/rule34 is a good option" WRONG, because why does Reddit track the subreddits you've visited clearly on the left side of the screen even if you don't have an account?

Thankfully I don't let *anyone* near my computer though, so it's all good. Apart from the fact that I also don't know how to turn off the thingy where it saves every webpage you've visted, but nobody really cares about that.

For example, if you want to search up literally anything but don't want anyone knowing, just use ibispaint x search thing because it's literally the love of my life

OH ALSO MY VINTED PACKAGE CAME TODAY MY WARDROBE IS GETTING CUNTIER BY THE DAYYYYYYYYY wait I'll take some pics

I dunno why but the second pic (the black & Pink shirt) is seen more clearly than the other but whatevr, I'M SOOOOO HAPPY I GOT THESE SHIRTS!!! And the crazy thing is, each shirt costed like 5€ each. What's even crazier is that I tried looking up the brand on the internet but there's no results. Like there's tags and everything but there's nothing on the web and it's also brand new, without tags!!!!!

Anyways back to the topic of gooning, I also personally think it's good when gifs/pictures are included, so I can imagine the scene. Except for when the media is completely different from how the characters actually look. I usually read like Hp fics when doing allat or just random fandoms, and they have a lot of things like that. I love the internet

Wish I was born with a dih, because wdym I'll never get to experience being hard? That was such a heartbreaking discovery to make like vro..

WILMON ENDGAME A YEAR AGO

  A dramatic take on life :3

18.3.25 

That's it. All this post is about

I LOVE YOUNG ROYALS 

 This show has literally changed my life in the best way possible and has helped me during some of my lowest points in my life (Jan 2023/Feb 2023) and I'm so grateful to have been part of the fandom for this long. I'm still in shock that it's been a year since it ended, so i won't write much (also cz I'm tired lmao) but I'm so fucking glad to have found this show, the actors, my fav artist and a bunch of fantastic people! I remember on the 17th of March 2024, I literally wrote out "Wilmon endgame" and put candles around it to form a circle to pretend I was doing a ritual for the endgame. I mean... It worked and I'm so relieved! I never really made any friends in the fandom that I still have, but even then, everyone is still amazing and so nice. Also about 'Young Royals Forever', it was really fun watching how everything was recorded, the setting, etc... And it was a wonderful way of saying goodbye. I also recorded a whole ass reaction of the last ep on my phone and everytime I watch it, I feel a little sad. We'll never really get to experience this again, no? It's like a part of my soul left in the car, too. 

Sorry for being like this lol, I just needed to write my love for it somewhere. Also might update this and making it longer when I'm feeling more energised

I love you ALL!!! TYSMM!!

(Lowk also wish that we get some deleted scenes or bloopers ijbol)

March is ass so far, please give me a break or I'll more jump more out the window

 A dramatic take on life :3

5.3.25 

PLEASEEE I'M SUFFERING and it's only the 5th day of March?!?!?

I stayed at home today and yesterday cz of Nausea and barely sleeping, while I went home early on monday (again) because of nausea

"Why r u sick?" Usually I would say that I don't know, but now I do and everytime I think about it I want to puke. But here's what heppened; 

I was in german class, yea? Boring asf but I have to do something to get out of this school educated. And we had homework due, I obvi gave it in because why wouldn't I??? Since we had a double lesson, he did have the time to correct our work before we left and I got my result back. FX. I'll give some extra context

"What the fuck is FX" A grade lower than F. Let's say, there's maybe 10 questions on the homework, if you get a 1, a 2 or a 3, you'd get FX. Then theres F, E (yes that too), D, C, B and A

"What does this shi have to do with sickness" I've never really gotten a grade lower than C, and I only got it about 3 times my whole life. And my mom wouldn't be really chill with that, but still chill enough while I'm not sure about my dad. He'd just give me an angry 5 hour lecture telling me to study more while literally wasting my study time. Seeing I got a 2/10 / FX on the homework, I panicked and felt sick. I asked to go to the bathroom and stayed there until I realized class was ending (so like 7 mins after) and left to pack up my stuff. Oh and I was also considered one of the best students that my german teacher taught, and I'm terrified at the thought of not being good enough anymore. Especially this second half-term is really important to see if I'll go into the next year...

After we had lunch, and my grade isn't allowed to use phones and we have to put them in lockers, but nobody does. Many kids use them in the bathrooms, and while I never did, this time I took it out to ask my mom to come pick me up because I felt sick. And, I've already asked the secretary to call my mom because I felt sick about 5 times this year already, so I was worried they'd think I was faking and send me back to lunch or class. They didn't, thank fuck, but I was still worried. 

I also feel like there isn't really an escape, since my parents have access to the website we use to check our grades, timetables, homework, absences, etc... and that damn FX is on there. 

Also, to why I failed the homework was because me and the other two kids who do L2 German weren't aware of it until the day it was due, since I also wasn't there the day it was assigned. We all had the time to do it together, but one of us missed the explanation, the other doesn't really speak German and the other barely pays attention, we still tried our best. 

The weird thing is, we all had the same answers but we got a different grade. I got FX, the girl who barely pays attention got F and the newer guy got E?

mood rn

What the fuck just happened #2

 A dramatic take on life :3

2.3.25 

So what the fuck just happened but it's pt.2 on the SAME DAY

My last post was made yesterday morning, so I still had the whole day to get through. And I almost killed myself in the middle, literally. I was working on h4nging myself but I had more things to do

Everything is normal, my parents screaming pretty much stopped ig but then m brother was gonna go to his friend's house, as mentioned last time. So I'll tell about how it went on the drive there.

So we live like 7 minutes car drive from the town's swimming pool (only for schools and stuff, not public) and next to it was a road we were driving on to get to said friend's house. While we were just a few meters from the traffic lights and other roads left and right. Two cars drive infront of us too quickly, which is dangerous but nothing happened. After that, a car pulls up next to us and the guy in there stars doing hand jestures that expressed him  being confused on something. My mom was replying with the Italian 🤌 (idk what its called) since she didnt know what he was talking ab. 

*WHAT HAPPENS NEXT IS SHOCKING* (+and traumatic, extra points!)

We don't know why, but because everyone was waiting for the green light and everyone was stopped, he exited his car and came up to ours quickly and angrily, and I mean he was ANGRY. 

I'll include a picture of inside a car from some stock image site to explain what happend. 

There it is. So M, is my mom driving, B and arrow is where my brother was and me is me. 

What happened was that the car was on my side, and I mentioed that he stood up and walked to us ANGRY. I don't know why, but he proceeds to OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR OF THE CAR and harass us... Vocally? But he also hit me, and it hurt bad. He was telling off my brother about something, and even though he was next to me, he was pointing at my brother and insulting us for some reason. He was obviously on alcohol and possiply durgs, his words didn't make any sense (and he was speaking French which we all know pretty much but we couldn't make out what he was saying) and his pupils were really big, and it was bright as fuck outside, only about 3:30pm. 

He just stayed there doing that for about 10 minutes while I was, and this may look stupid, just like this the whole time 

 Except I wasn't holding my glasses but my phone and my coat. And, my eyes were a little less shocked and my mouth was normal. But yea, still shocked as fuck and scared. He hit me, there was fucking spit going to the floor when he said something very agressively and it was all shit. A minute before he stopped I started sobbing and I just did so for almost an hour. We drove off, and tried to remeber as many details of his car and stuff as possible, to report to the police. We arrived at my bro's friend's house after like 3 minutes and my mom quickly explained why we were late as I was in the car, still sobbing as I took my phone to call my best friend. 

I asked her in the morning if I could call her any time of day and she said she couldn't, but I forgot about that there. I just waited for her to pick up, 

"Can I call? Or are you busy?" was the first thing I said, my voice a bit weird. She said yes, and while still crying I explained what happend (ft. a shit ton of stuttering) and we just kept calling for 30 minutes after, instead talking about the drama at school to forget about it.

I came home and went straight to my room, still talking with her and laying in my bed, a bit more relaxed. Then all of a sudden, I hear this yell coming from a certain someone who was screaming eariler today too; my dad.

He was telling me to get dressed and get in the car. "I just left it 5 minutes age, what the fuck?" I thought, and he starts asking questions about where it happend, how and everything.

Long story short, we went around our whole city's parking lots and didn't find anything, since we were going to go look for him. We didn't find him, and I kept begging my dad to go to the police instead of looking for him in useless places. 

We did end up going to the police and hour later, and guess the fuck what?
Because there's no proof that I got physically hurt, (since it didn't bruise or some shit, I wasn't listening anymore) and verbal harassment can't be punished unless it's serious threats.

I HATE THIS FUCKASS COUNTRY, GET ME OUT OF HERE

Oh, and here's some bonuses!!!

 - I looked inside his car when he was leaving back, his wife was in there. Wanna know how she looked like? Imagine Ash Trevino if she lost like 10kg.

 

- He claimed to have a daughter around my brother's age in the car. How would he like to insult and scream at his own daughter? Oh wait, nevermind. There wouldn't be much of a difference since he doesnt give a single shit. That Ash wannabe hoe didn't even bother reacting to what she was seeing, just all there calm and whatever. 

 - His fingerprints were on the car for a good amount of time, until my mom disinfected the whole door he touched a few hours ago. But the police said we couldn't identify by that. I'm not even old enough to be an officer, and I know that guy's ass was lying. 

 - As if my day couldn't get worse, when we were going back to the parking lot to pay for the space and leave, my ex-bestfriend of two years ago who turned out to be a conniving bitch who wants nothing but attention. And worse enough, our cars were parked NEXT TO EACHOTHER (since we both had no idea how they looked like, we couldn't even avoid it)

Now for my final wishes; To not speak to another man above the age of 15 until I'm old enough to forget about all this, and possibly not go outside anymore.

Literally traumatizing.

Oki baiii!!! ^^

What the fuck just happened

 A dramatic take on life :3

1.3.25 

So what the fuck just happend

Uhhh idk tw: parents?? 

I was just writing and texting my best friend, A, who's in another school if we could call, while my parents were on the other side of the room discussing my brother's communion and who to invite, where, when and I also think they were wondering where to go this summer since we always go to my grandma's house and my grandparents. Then my mom started saying about how when we're at my dad's parent's house, he always goes to random places and leaves us alone with nothing to do, since usually we go to the beach all together .

I don't know how exactly it got there, but then it became a mess of them screaming as loud as they could to eachother across the table, before my dad started bashing whatever he had in his hands on the table (since he was sitting down) before standing up and I don't know...  Then my mom turned around to her back and her voice started to sound like she was gonna cry and ran upstairs and then I was just shocked, because they did disagree sometimes, naturally, but it never got to this point as far as I can remember.

 And although I was acting like I was minding my business and not listening to the conversation, I was and I froze completely when that all started. My dad followed her upstairs and I didn't know what he was about to do because you never know, but I couldn't for 5 minutes. Then when I did stand up, I fell to my knees again because I physically felt like I couldn't, but that's been like that since Wednesday so yeah, but then I also started crying (?) which is weird because I'm not the type of person to cry easily. Then when I finally managed to stand up, I went upstairs and my mom was at the top of the stairs, and my dad like 2 meters infront of her. Just to make sure nothing was gonna happen.

Then my brother came out of our room, which is next to the top of the stairs and was like "wtf just happened" but went downstairs before he got his question answered. I don't want him to see all this, he just turned 10, after all. And he's gonna go to his friend's house today so I don't want him to stop being happy because of what just happened.

I'm back in the living room writing this, I don't know where my dad is, my brother's in the basement for wtv reason and my mom's upstairs still. There hasn't been a word spoken for about 20 minutes now and my hands are shaking just typing this, but I still want to. So are my legs, which my laptop is on, so excuse me if there's any typos.

Oh never mind wtf they're talking. My dad is mad asf, idk how to say it in english but in Italian it's "incazzato" and my mom is laughing saying 

"stop it now, I'm tired." I guess it's better now, but I'm still scared. They disagree on something everyday, and what if it gets to this point over and over? 

This all, and more that I didn't write ab, happened in the span of like 20 mins??

 (made by me ^.^)

Lowk hate my class it's not even funny anymore

 A dramatic take on life :3

27.2.25 (posted on 1.3.25)

Yea, please get me out of here asap. Everyone is kinda shit in their own way, and I just can't take it anymore. The only two people I can stand in here are my two friends in other classes. For example, let me tell you about what happened today; 

First, my English teacher wasn't there. And I don't like her at all and I had homework I didn't finish so I was obviously happy asf! But during étude (45 mins study time after/before lunch depending on ur class) where my English teacher was also supposed 2 look after but there was a sub, yea?  since nobody had work to do since we all finished it, we watched the news quickly and everyone was being loud so the sub turned it off and bla bla bla... 

Then one of my classmates that I used to sorta stand wrote down on a peice of paper "Women should belong in the kitchen and..." and idk what he wrote after that. Then, one of the guys who we'll call P snatched the paper and gave it to the girls who were all sitting together and showed it to them.

My friend sent in a gc the pic of the paper but b4 she deleted it I copied it and it was then saved to my notes so here it is;

text; "Petition 

"women should be in the kitchen cooking, cleaning the house and taking care of the kids" What the fuck

 Everyone started yelling for the sub to come and read what was written on the paper and then the guy got a lecture and the sub tried her hardest to make him feel guilty. It worked.

(Note on 1.3.25) 

It all kinda went to shit after that, but I'm not feeling to well rn to finish writing it. I'll try to when I feel better, I'll start another post.